Sirius & Lux

grandparent > i think
grandparent > i just want someone who cares about me for me
grandparent > that i care just as much
grandparent > like we try and equal amount
grandparent >
grandparent > i think that's what sort of got me rethinking how i felt about Cyress
grandparent > not only are our interests a little far apart
grandparent > but also they had no investment in me
grandparent > not that they had to have an investment
grandparent > but i knew i would be going back to trying to impress someone
grandparent > even if that ended up with something mutual, i would still be regressing
grandparent >
grandparent >
grandparent > i need mutuality

doggy style > hmm okay
doggy style > at least now you know what you want more
doggy style > so you want someone that's as invested in you as you are in them
doggy style > high standards but there's no reason they can't be met

grandparent > you think it'd be hard for someone to be invested in me?

doggy style > no no no that's not what I meant
doggy style > I mean like
doggy style > our culture today is sort of. shallow?
doggy style > and it's hard to make a meaningful connection with people
doggy style > it's doable, it's just hard to find people that are willing to make those connections
doggy style > I think someone out there would absolutely love to be with you, lux
doggy style > you just gotta find em

grandparent > i
grandparent > ok
grandparent > sorry, my reply was a little self depreciating
grandparent >
grandparent > i'm sure i'll find someone some day too
grandparent > even if being lonely isn't the best feeling
grandparent > i'm willing to put up with it for that 'some day'

doggy style > it's cool self deprecation is basically my personal remix so I get it
doggy style > yeah you'll find someone!! I believe in u
doggy style > you gotta be willing to look for them though bc they aren't gonna just drop into your lap

grandparent > oh
grandparent > don't get me wrong
grandparent > i don't mean to just
grandparent > expect someone to care for me out of nowhere
grandparent > i do intend to look
grandparent > just
grandparent > i have to be a little more reserved
grandparent > before instantly feeling like i have feelings for someone

doggy style > yea that sounds good
doggy style > be wary of catching feelings and ask urself if it's real or just infatuation
doggy style > or just the loneliness talking

grandparent > yeah
grandparent >
grandparent >
grandparent > it's been good talking to you about this, Sirius
grandparent > i really appreciate your responses
grandparent > if you need to talk about anything, i'm all ears
grandparent >
grandparent > it's a pun

doggy style > haha because your ears are really long I get it
doggy style >
doggy style > does anyone miss me yet

grandparent > i'm sure they do
grandparent > i do
grandparent > we just haven't found a moment to mention missing you aloud yet

doggy style > lol
doggy style > I know I made a big show of like leaving and everything but like
doggy style > I miss going to work
doggy style > and I miss people there
doggy style > including you
doggy style > but I can't shake the feeling that everything is probably going fine or better than fine without me
doggy style > like I'm not a necessary piece of the puzzle u kno

grandparent > oh Sirius,
grandparent > i think it's kind of foolhardy to think of DoCA as a puzzle
grandparent > maybe a little because i don't like you excluding yourself
grandparent > but also because it's collaborative and changing
grandparent > and you fit into the flow nicely
grandparent > explaining it like a puzzle just makes things ridged
grandparent > because if you were an essential piece, you'd feel bad about spending time away
grandparent > but if you feel like you're not then you feel disconnected
grandparent > so
grandparent > we're not a puzzle